...of warm hugs, subtle kisses n family reunions

Last night me and Ritesh went to pick up a friend coming from Spain. We had to wait for around 1 and a half hours for them to come out.

And during this wait we witnessed so many families and friends reunite. It was a very exhilarating experience. The long waits...the searching eyes...then a glimpse of their loved ones...and then a sudden smile...the rush to meet them...the hugs...the kisses...the laughs...the questions...the compliments...the sound of shutter to capture the moment forever...the jumping around...wow!!!

That reminded me of the times when Ritesh came to Tokyo to meet me and when I cam back from Tokyo... :-)

Odds at each other's side!

Last week, I was travelling to my hometown by train. It made a halt at a place, I don't which station it was as it was really dark and I was inside a new "postered" Rajdhani Express. But I still could see clearly the train standing right next to ours. As we slowly swayed past the train, one stark reality hit me. There was a sparsely filled AC coach with people sleeping with all the leisures in the world. And right next to it was a general compartment, overflowing with people, people who don't know what leisure is, people who have to even fight for the little place to sit clumsily. This is the harsh reality of India. The great divide, with which every passing second is getting wider. Though its has always been present, in and around me, but don't know why it moved me that moment so much as to make me feel like crying.

Where will this end? Would those hard working souls just persih without being rewarded? I don't know. All I can see is a bleak future. How much ever the better becomes best, the true victory of a nation is tp lift the worse to atleast good!

So Long....

So long....so long I had stayed away from my camera...I don't know why and how it happened. But a refreshing break came to me in form of a pleasant surprise. One night I got a call from my uncle, to join them on a trip to Shravanbelgola. Oh, I just can't describe how I felt at that moment. I was like..."Finally my hands and my eyes will be put to some worth" :D .

But I was worried too, as I had not taken photographs for months. I didn't know that I did remember photography, or would it have evaporated out of me. But once my hands were on the shutter button and my eyes looking through the viewfinder, nothing was stopping me. And I so very enjoyed doing what I used to love a few months back. Here are just a few shots from the trip. Do tell me how you found them. I would be uploading the entire set soon on my Flickr. So, watch out.

She Blogs...

Ouch...! That really hurt. I heard these words and started wondering: am I really blogging? I used to take such pride in that some time ago (rather some years ago...sigh). Whom am I lying to, by saying that i blog? How can I betray me, myself and my blog? I have been making unfulfilled promises from long that I will get back to it. But I haven't. I can no longer be called in the category of bloggers (...sobs...). I feel so ashamed, angered on myself. How did I let this happen?

Is it my laziness or my indifference or just a stagnation of events in my life? I will have to sit and think about the right blend of reasons for this misfortune of mine. And this time I wont make promises, instead let the time tell what I finally made out of this mess.

Tip Tip Tip Baarish

Just came back from a refreshing bath in the nature's shower :D.

It started raining some time back and I was sitting all alone in the house and wondering, what the hell am I doing? And that's it...went up to the terrace to have a good feel of the rain.

Its so long that I intentionally got drenched...And it was truly worth going up there.

Woh thandi thandi baarish ki boondein...
woh sansanaate patton ki awaaz...
woh gili farsh pe panv rakhna...
woh paani mein uchalna...
woh baadlon ka garazna...
aur woh jhoom ke gaane gaana...


Ohhh...It was so romantic...so magical...
It made me so happy...that I came down and started writing a post...after a long long time...

I wish each one of you who is reading this to have an unrestrained joy like this. :-)

Happy Monsoon to everyone!

Clueless Scribble!

I have been trying to write something for a long time. Writing gives me a sense of satisfaction. So, I started to think...what should I write. Many things came to my mind, politics, corruption, media, communal riots, traffic blues, natural calamities, war and peace, etc. But, there is already lots written, read and ignored, stuff on these topics. Coz these are the usual masala that you can read tons of articles on. I had to think something different.

The other thing I could possible write was about my life. Now, there is another small problem to it. My life's story, if taken out my name, can be identified as story of so many people around me. That makes it non-unique. On that, a thought came to my mind. All of us are bound by so many things in life. We are bound by the society, by traditions, by the people we love, by our own narrow mindedness. Sometimes I feel, as if I am a captive in my own house. When I lie down on the bed, I feel that the ceiling binds me. It would have been so good, if I could ogle at the handsome Moon, and be envious of the beautiful stars. When I am on the roads, the traffic binds me. It would have been so good if it would be a muddy path that disappears into lush green woods with a magical mist around (almost a fairytale...right).

But I am bound, and I dont have the means to break this bound. I really adore those people who could divert themselves from the narrow line placed in front of them, and chase their dreams. I also dream, of freedom, of breaking free of traditions and follow my passions. I also want to hold the hands of life and walk towards the misty woods. I also want to whisper to the wind and fly with the clouds. But I am bound...but I am bound.

City of My Dreams!!

This one is for all of my friends from school and college and yup for all those people who hail from the wonderful city called "Bhopal".

I was kind of away from the city for say three years. And when I got the chance to be their again...I just hopped on the train and headed for the city. I had anticipated many changes and was kind of apprehensive that this modernisation might have changed my Bhopal. So, when i reached Bhopal, I kinda stepped out of the train with wary steps but full with excitement :-). It was 1:00 A.M. , the city was silent but it still looked so beautiful, as a lady draped in darkness. I just couldnt wait for the dawn to break so that I could go around and see the brighter side of it.

The day was all the more thrilling, starting from Jawahar chowk...my last home...then down the New Market main road, Top N Town, Roshanpura naka, down the road to Ravindra Bhawan, off to Lake side, Bharat Bhawan, and then the most beautiful view I saw in days...our very own 'Bada Talaab'. Then off to Kamla Park, Gauhar Mahal and swiftly onto the VIP road. Wow, the ride was so good, the same road on which I drove almost daily for four years, so many memories. While coming back I saw the perfect sunset, Sun sinking into the water of the Lake. The day was mesmerizing, set in the city I love the most :-).

During my drive through the town I noticed some very good things. Firstly the roads, after driving on the roads...rather streets of bangalore, bhopal roads were like the haven :-). I wish I had a bike and could just fly on the roads of Bhopal :D. The other thing that caught my attention were the murals on the squares and the road side walls by tribal people. I liked the concept of keeping bad posters and advertisements from creeping-in on the road side walls :-). And it looked pretty neat and artistic :-). I came to know that Bhopal was actually promoting a lot of art from nearby villages and tribal areas.

Well, next day I started off early in the morning. And this time, I covered the other side of the city. Starting from my house, through newly built Platinum Plaza (must say...amazing to see such structures in bhopal), then from Nankay (my regular petrol bunk) to the Link road, crossing Mayur Park (my childhood favorite) and from Chinar Park (place for our very entertaining GMs :D) taking a turn towards 5 no stop, Subhash School (abhivyakti garba nights...ooohh), then Bitthan Market (one of the most happening places now), towards 10 no. stop. Gosh it was a long way down the memory lane. But truly the best moments of my life spent over here.

Bhopal has always been the city of my dreams, and if not for practical reasons, I would love to spend the entire of my life in this peaceful city, amidst the lush green gardens and placid blue lakes. For me its the pradise, the ultimate city to live in :).

Siskiyan

Tode saare khwaab maine,
bikheri saari khushiyan.
Maine hi chupaya chand ko,
gira diye saare taare asmaan se.
Mitaya maine hi indradhanush ko,
chura li phoolon ki khusboo.
Khud hi bichaye raaste pe kaantein,
bujha di jeevan se roshini.
Bhare maine hi aankhon mein aansoo,
cheen li labon ki hansi.
Choda maine hi zindagi ka aanchal,
chuta ummeed ka daaman.
Reh gaya mere dil mein dard,
aur meri aankhon mein Siskiyan.

When!!

When I look at the moon,
I see you smiling at me;
When I glance around the stars,
I find you winking at me;
When I try to look at the sun,
I feel the intensity of your love for me;
When I walk on the shore,
I see you rushing towards me;
When I hear the birds,
I hear you singing for me;
When a breeze passes by me,
I feel as if you embraced me;
When I hold a flower in my hand,
I see you admiring me in my lap;
When I am standing in the rain,
I feel the slight touch of yours on my face;
When I smell the fresh earth,
I smell your breath in it;
When I see the mirror,
I can see you in my eyes.

Dream...

Toh mar jao”, he said as he got up and started for the house.
“Tum yehi chahte ho na ki main mar jaon”, she said with a calm voice sitting on the chair, “Then do one thing, mujhe utha ke wahan phenk do.”
He stopped, looked at her with all the ire he had inside him and leaped to pick her up. She felt the grip of his hand across her waist and a sudden jerk and she was in the air and then splash, into the water. She saw him walking away into the house through the thin film of water across her face.
The world started sinking in front of her eyes. The sky was drifting away; the sounds were fading with every passing fraction of a second. All her life flashed across her eyes and she could hardly think anymore. Within few moments she had reached the bottom of the pool, bottom of her world and the wick of her life was out.

Though I don’t see dreams usually but this one I had seen during my train journey and was marked distinctly in my memory.

Coming Home!!

As I opened the door, a heavy gust of wind blew on my face. My nose got filled with the smell of the fresh earth. My eyes were bejeweled by the sky, full of shinier stars than what I usually see. I stood there holding the bars and peeking outside. The chill was making my hands ache but the feel of the air and the environment was not letting me come in and close the door. All the pain was subsided by just one feeling, presence of being in the place I longed to be at. At last, I was back at home.

Was it a year??

[Firstly, a very happy new year to all the people who drop by my blog :-)...hope to see more traffic this year ;-) and sorry for updating late...was damn busy with work.]

2005 - Was it really just one year? It seemed like a decade to me!! So many things happened, so many things left behind, so many things new in the life, so many changes in and around me. It seemed as if I am living somebody else's life.

Jan, 2005 - I stepped into bangalore with stars in my eyes. I was full with apprehension but with lotsa zeal to tap into a new world, a new life. But as time went past, I realized that this was not what I had dreamt of, the life, rather the world, was vastly different from my imagination. I experieneced so many new things. And my craving for my former life kept on increasing by each passing day and night. I started cribbing for my decision of doing my internship. I was totally irritated by the new life. All I used to do was live in memories. I was not only missing the recent things in my life, I started thinking about and missing the long lost and previously forgotten days. I was at loggerheads with the present and didnt want to come out of my past.

But as they say, time heals all wounds. So were my wounds healed, but in the process of healing I was transformed. I was no more the same old kosha, I underwent tremendous changes, many good and a few bad too. I became more calm and serene...I lost my innocence towards the world. Now I know this world and am a part of it.

Till now I have only written about the things that I lost. But it was an year of give and take. I gained as much as I lost. I met and made many very good friends. Though its a part of life to make new friends but for me the number just soared in leaps and bounds. I, being a born introvert, had never expected to make so many friends. For that I will definitely thanks orkut. This was indeed the first time that I made online friends. But as time passed I realized that its not wise to have toooo many friends. You loose the closeness with friends in trying to keep up with all. Things became tangled up, life became so complicated. You tend to realize it when ypu have many many friends, and loads of work and deadlines approaching. I had never experienced this before. Where was my care-free life, Where was my always ready with a solution attitude? I suddenly started feeling much matured and old. It was as if the childhood of a child was snatched away. The sky was devoid of its moon.

One more change that I saw was, I got a bit detached from the family life. Living alone and with friends made me little less sensitive towards family. Which I am gonna change in this year, coz ultimately its family, which is utmost important. And I dont wanna loose on that front ever.

The other major thing in 2005 was becoming responsible and start my job. I faced many problems initially in adjusting and adapting to the work environment. I still am in the process though. I gained a sense of responsibility, a sense of belonging. I felt independent, confident. I now know that I can survive in this world.

Another milestone added in my life was - blogging. Blogs helped me improve on writing, though I still feel that I am an amateur, they hepled me to understand myself, detangle my random thoughts and organize them, they were a gateway to my unexplored regions.

Overall, year 2005 was the most different and the lengthiest year till now of my journey of 24 years. It will always be etched in my memory as a milestone year.

Another Leaf from my diary

Life, What does it mean to me
a game, a path, a war, a prayer
or just a creation of GOD.

Whatever it is, its so beautiful
filled with the colors of joy
like a sunshine in the clear blue sky.

Its pure, like the water
of the rivers that flow down
the mountains of the world.

Its as vast as the universe,
the universe, which has baffled
each and every of us.

But a life is a life,
it can be as huge as an ocean,
or as small as an ant.

It can be as pretty as a rose,
and as ugly as a corpse,
depending who owns it.

Saathi!!

This is a reply to a question asked to me a few days ago....

Can I forget,
Meeting a person like him?
Can I forget,
The long late night talks we had?
Can I forget,
The pampering I get from him?
Can I forget,
The "yes" for anything I say?
Can I forget,
The adoration I get from him?
Can I forget,
The things I could do, just coz of him?
Can I forget,
The best mentor I had in my life?
Can I forget,
The person to whom I can tell anything?
Can I forget,
Those eyes, that face, that smile?
Can I forget,
One of my closest friend???

Huh!!!

God!! why am I staying in this city?? *sigh*

I am vexed, aggravated, frustrated, angry and above all tired of my daily travel from home to office and then back home. I dont want to start for office in the morning and similarly for home in the evening. I, literally, dread the voyage...yes it seems like a voyage. A daily fight through the always jam traffic, wading through the sea of vehicles. I feel like I am trapped...which makes me feel uncomfortable...I cant move in any direction...have to stand helplessly. And wait for the damned traffic to move....with strange people wading past me. Seriously, people think that "ye road unke baap ki jaagir hai". And footpath also. Its not a less headache to walk on these roads too.

Over the top the 'mashallah' roads, with uncountable potholes. I have seen the worse-than-worst roads after coming to this city. And the rains.....this city has started making me dislike rains. Overdose of anything is not good....and here we are getting too much overdose of rain. Already the roads were a hindrance test...with the rains it has become a roller coaster ride to drive on the roads of bangalore. It tests all parts of the body for tolerating high stress. If somebody is very healthy and fit...dont worry driving on these roads will soon make you go consult a doctor.

I dont have any hopes of getting the problems solved...and I will have to go through the torment of drving through the roads of bangalore daily!! Huh!!

A Thousand Desires

These lines are from a song from the movie hazaron khwahishein aisi....


A Thousand Desires such as these
A thousand moments to set this night on fire
Reach out and you can touch them
You can touch them with your silences
You can reach them with your lust
Rivers, mountains, rain
Rain against a torrid hillscape
A thousand
A thousand desires such as these

I loved rain as a child
As a lost young man
Empty landscapes bleached by a tired sun
And then
And then
Suddenly it came like a dark unknown woman
Her eyes scorched my silences
Her body wrapped itself around me like a summer without end

Pause me
Hold me
Reach me where no man has gone
Crossing the seven seas
With the wings of fire
I fly towards nowhere
And you
Rivers, mountains, rain
Rain against the scorched landscape of pain

A Thousand Desires such as these
A thousand moments to set this night on fire
Reach out and you can touch them
You can touch them with your silences
You can reach them with your lust
Rivers, mountains, rain
Rain against a torrid hillscape
A thousand
A thousand desires such as these

You!!

Your face....
Calm and Serene as still waters
Your Eyes....
The burning heat of a wild fire
Your lips....
Arousing a thousand desires
Your Smile....
The lamp of life in darkness
Your Touch....
A spike of current
Your Voice....
The chime of knoll on the church
You....
Embracing n cuddling in my thoughts

Meghdhanusha

On my way

Above the lake

Was a sky so blue

Like the ocean hue

With cotton strew

As the bunch of clouds

The moon at its shine

To give a bright sight

And a colorful bow

To tie the gift for me.

la pioggia!!

The sky is filled with silver clouds,
making the noise of thunders aloud.
The God's gentle and soothing shower,
watering that sweet little flower.
Hear, the music of the breeze,
swaying back and forth, the huge trees.
Enjoy, the music of the little rain droplets,
falling on the new formed water palettes.
Dance, on the thunders in the background,
and in between a frog on the round.
Smell, the freshness of the earth,
as if its a rebirth.
Cheer up, coz its that time of the year,
to sing and dance with the nature dear.
With everything around so real, so green,
I hope it does not turn into a dream.

I like rains a lot ;-)

Life!!

Life, a simple little word,
carrying the meaning of whole world.
Life, with all its mystery and irony,
is not worth any money.
Life, with all its ups and downs,
gives us the power of sensitivity.
Life, with its strongness and fragility,
teaches us the best lessons to learn.
Life, with all its love and hate,
is not mere, the lines of fate.
Life, is a mirror of us,
reflecting our deeds and doings.
Life, is in our hand, whether,
to make it a blooming flower
or the worst ever nightmare.
think and think to dare.